The Mind Gone Mad

OK I came to another realization with the show Supernatural since I have had the luxury to review the entire first season these last few days. My theory about the Demon and his use of colt and the last bullet remains the same. Except for one thing: he doesn’t have the last bullet.

Let’s think about this for a moment. The legend of the colt goes that Samuel Colt created the gun for a hunter during his time (roughly the early 1800s). With this gun he also made 13 unique bullets. These bullets, along with the colt, had the power to kill anything. This hunter used exactly 6 bullets then both the colt and remaining 7 bullets disappeared. Now fast forward to the show. Daniel Elkins has the colt and 5 bullets. He never fired the gun when the viewer sees him with it. The Winchesters acquire the colt with the exact same amount of bullets. John Winchester fired one bullet and killed a vampire, Sam fired once and missed the Demon, Dean shot once and killed the Demon’s son, Sam fires it once to wound the Demon, and the last bullet remains in the chamber. Follow me so far? Yes, there is only 1 bullet left in the colt, but there are 2 that are unaccounted for.

Now of course it is possible that the wonderfully sunny Daniel Elkins used those two bullets himself, but we have no proof of that. After all the guy was a vampire hunter and he knew how else to kill them. Why waste such powerful bullets like that? The bottom line is, unless otherwise stated, we the viewers cannot assume those 2 other bullets have been used. It’s a gun that had been missing for almost 2 centuries. Those bullets could be anywhere.

Why do I care so much? Because it opens yet another door of possibility as to where this show can go, and I like that. I enjoy not knowing exactly what’s happening and seeing it unfold in front of me. I can totally picture this season ending with that last bullet being fired, but then someone mentions there are still 2 more left and thus we have a plot for the third season. I mean, why the hell not?

Nighty night.

Can you believe that I have had not one, but two women in my life say to me “I’m not weird!” when I said they were? Two! With the exact same response! What the feck is that about?! And what is so wrong with being labeled as weird? Damnit, that is a compliment from me and you should embrace it! What makes us weird is what makes us unique. And what is it that makes us weird? Everything! Our interests, our obsessions, our little quirks, and all the other shit we do day in and day out.

That being said, I myself am going to list all the things that I think make me weird. I not only acknowledge all of these things, but I enjoy them!

-My love for the Legend of Zelda series
-My obsession and need to analyze everything that happened in the show Carnivale
-That I am starting to do the same thing with the show Supernatural
-When I saw the trailer for TMNT I jumped up and down like a I first did when the original Ninja Turtles movie came out in like ‘90 and I was 5 then.
-That I still find it the funniest fucking thing ever to scare the shit out of my brother when he comes out of the bathroom
-Or when I scare the shit out of my sister with the life size Derek Jeter cardboard cutout
-My need to be obsessive compulsive with only little things like having my DVDs not only in alphabetical order, but always facing up when in the CD holder
-Getting angry at all the Superman and Batman movies for being very inaccurate
-That I formed and now co-lead my own online gaming clan
-That I like the movie Water World
-That I want to have a catch every hour of every day regardless of the weather
-Don Mattingly, Tino Martinez, Al Leiter, Andy Pettitte, Bubba Crosby… I love them
-That I will spend hours placing things around the houses I buy in the game Oblivion when that is not something that has any real importance in the game other than its a role play factor
-That I am willing to do anything that causes me physical pain if it means getting a laugh out of someone
-Age: 21+ Amount of alcoholic drinks: 0
-That I have almost every one of Eddie Izzard’s standup specials memorized verbatim
-I’m a Yankee fan. I do not hate the Boston Red Sox. In fact I respect them greatly
-I was friends with the Schmuck
-That thing I can do with my pinky
-That I call my laptop lappy
-My use of the fake words “rawr” and “shcava”
-That I made this list

Those were just the ones off the top of my head. If you got anymore that pertain to me PLEASE comment.

So a little more than a week ago my dad and I go to a boat show. He’s been going to these things for years and asks me like every month if I’ll join him and I never do. I always felt guilty for not going because I know he wanted me there, but honestly I never said yes because I knew he was never going to buy anything. He was just going to look around, talk with the sales people, leave me standing there, then leave 90 minutes later. Well after some unforeseen events only a short time before, I decided that I wanted to humor the old man and went with him. Here it is my first time actually going to one of these things with him and guess what? He decided to buy one.

Now I don’t know if it was my being there that had any affect on his making this decision since I myself know a thing or two about water crafts and I kept saying “No” to half the boats he stopped to look at. But he said he has had his eye on a Sugar Sand Jetboat for a few years now and when I saw this thing I almost needed new pants. Why? What exactly is a Sugar Sand Jetboat? Here….

Hotties not included (sad, but true).

But do you see that thing? Nice right? Well here is why they also call it a jetboat. It has the same motor functions as a personal water caft (jetski for you non boat savy people). Instead of a rotating propeller blade, it uses the pump jet impeller that pushes the boat forward by shooting out the water and all that. So it has the movement and feel of a jetski (and that means all the 180s I have done), but it is also a full sized boat. Starting to understand why I almost needed new pants?

My dad told me that he has already put a deposit down on one. He and I will more than likely give one a test drive anyway just to get used to the sucker. There is a down side though. To save money we are obviously selling our current boat. I was expecting that. That’s not the down side. The down side is that we are also selling out jetski. I’m going to miss it…. Ah well! Jetboat!!!!

Yes, that’s right! I have supernatural thoughts! Er…or maybe it’s just my thoughts on the television show Supernatural. Yeah, that sounds better.

So I’ve been watching this show since it’s original air date, and have enjoyed it. I’m very much into Eric Kripke’s story about the coming war between good and evil. I seem to always be attracted to those types of stories (RIP Carnivale ). But I also enjoy how dead on the writers are getting the subtle things that go on between the two brothers. I myself being both a younger and old brother, I pick up and enjoy them quite a bit.

But aside from that, I’ve been wondering just where the show is heading and one thing I can’t quite get out of my head: The Demon has the Colt. It is a gun that has the ability to kill anything. There is one bullet left which the Demon also has. Now think about this for a second. He’s a Demon. Hell, he’s probably THE Demon (Satan for all you slow people). If you were him, and you were starting a war between Heaven and Hell using Earth as the battleground, having the lines drawn, each side recruiting help, and you had a gun that could kill anything with only one shot left, who would you use it on? Not only is this Demon starting a holy war, but he has the throne in mind? Oh this could get really interesting.

Just got back from seeing this movie no more than an hour ago. I’m going to comment on it now then in a day or two after it has settled in my head for a bit.

 Initial thoughts: Good movie. It had nice acting, the emotion of the characters might seem over the top to some, but when you consider the time period, their lifestyle, and what exactly they were going through, I believe it. I really enjoyed the detail as well. The battle formations of the time, the clothing, the buildings, even the way you can see that the pieces of gold from Persia had rough edges because they had to have been heated and pressed in a mold. That was something they totally didn’t have to include in the movie and no one would have noticed or cared, but they did it. I like it when a film will go that extra mile just for the sake of accuracy. Yet at the same time, there were so many fictional elements too. They blended those two things together quite well.

There was a plot, but not much of one. It was simple. It was a tale of standing up for what you believe in even though you know it’s going to get you killed. They depict that fact by having many many many amazing fight scenes. Sitting there I thought “There is a lot of slow motion going on,” but soon realized it was done so the viewer could get a good look at how these guys moved in battle. Nice touch.

 More to come……….

Ok I realized what it was that felt simple about this movie: lack of character development. They didn’t really go into anyone’s life. Sure they said all that stuff about Leonidas’ upbringing, but it was brief. This movie felt more like a film student’s work on fight scenes (which were still the most amazing I have ever seen). The rest of it seemed to just be an excuse to make it a full length film. Either way, no regrets about seeing it. I’ll probably get it when it comes to DVD.

I have to start off by saying that it is a little ironic that I’m writing this since I am more or less about to do what I have a gripe about. And so….

The topic of today is how there are certain people I know who bitch and moan about every last thing claiming it to be annoying and yet completely fail to realize just how annoying that is. I am not a fan of complaining. In fact I can’t stand it. I can understand a heat of the moment complaint. You order chicken, the waiter brings you a steak. You’re driving along, and some dumbass cuts you off. Those and other moments in life, ok cool. You do need to vent some of the time. But what I don’t really have much tolerance for are the people who after the fact, decide to carry on and on about the little things that annoyed them. Get over it! Grind your teeth, clear your throat, and move on with your day.

Like I siad, ironic that I’m doing this. Of course what I am doing is writing it down. No one said you have to read this. That’s your deal. No, what I am refering to are the poeple who sit there and talk about every last piece of shit thing that happened to them in the last 24 hours and why it upset them. Do you people actually think that I am in such a place that I want to hear about the creepy guy on the subway or the way the salt shaker pisses you off? It’s a fecking salt shaker! If that is your biggest problem in life, you’ve got it made!

Look, I understand letting off steam and all that, but you gotta pick your battles. Let the little things go. They aren’t important. If you keep complaining, soon you’re going to find that nothing is good enough  even though it is. Then you’ll find that you’re an old bastard who does nothing but grumble at the world and yell at the kids trying to play hind and seek because they went into your bushes. LET THEM PLAY! You’re damn hedges are ugly anyway! These aren’t prized plants you have growing in your yard. After that you will be even older and death is only around the corner. Maybe you have a family all grown up, maybe you don’t either. Either way you are now known as the crankiest old fart in 5 counties and you come to the sad realization that you complained your life away and missed out on the world. You die alone. So let me be the one to help you avoid that….Shut up!

First, go listen to this:

http://media.putfile.com/Joe-Rogan-Exposes-Joke-Thieves

Yes, it is long, but listen to it damnit!

For those who ignored my demand and did not listen… good job. I am impressed. For your incredibly laziness you shall now be rewarded with a quick summary of what that link pertains to.

It is an audio clip from the Opie and Anthony Show from (I’m guessing) some time last year. On it, comedian Joe Rogan is making claims that fellow comedian Dane Cook has been stealing other comics material not only recently, but for years. I have listened to this clip several times now, and I gotta say that I believe Rogan.

For one, he says of Dane Cook what I have been saying for over a year now. Dane Cook is really not all that funny when you really think about it. His material is goofy at best. He doesn’t have the kind of jokes where you can just read them and you start laughing. Instead the vast majority of Dane’s success has come from his hard work and his brilliant ability to promote himself and advertise himself. It isn’t his comedy that attracts a person to Dane Cook, it’s his persona. It’s the guy on stage, not his material. Yes, you laugh at his jokes and I’m sure you repeat them several times over, but it isn’t the kind of comedy where you think “Holy shit that was the funniest thing I have ever heard.” And for those who did ever think that: you need to expand on what stand up comics you listen to. Try Mitch Hedberg. Now there was a comedic genius.

The other reason I believe Joe Rogan is simple: he brings proof. In that audio clip, Rogan plays three bits from a Louis C.K. HBO stand up special that aired in 2001. Those three jokes all ended up rewritten on Dane Cook’s last album. Those jokes were the guy about to struck by a vehicle, itchy asshole, and naming his children. They were all very much similar to jokes Louis C.K. did years before. I for one do not believe that three jokes from one comedian in the same HBO special ended up on another comedian’s CD by mere coincidence. What makes it even worse (in my opinion, for Dane Cook) is that the Louis C.K. versions of the joke were better. He didn’t only steal the material, but he failed to improve upon them. C.K. had better timing, but punch lines, and he even said them better. Dane is just shouting in his versions.

Now I’ve been following Dane Cook for a long time now. Longer than most other people. I first saw him on Comedy Central in 1999 and have been quoting him since I was 14. That makes it about 8 years now I have known about him and have been following his career. Most people I know never heard about him until  2002-2003 ish. I have always liked Dane Cook and have thought that he is a fairly good comedian, but I guess that even though I have known about him longer than most average fans, I never bought into the hype. I’ve been a serious fan of stand up comedy for almost 10 years now and I gotta repeat it: Dane Cook has average material. His jokes are generic at best. He might be packing the house and his CDs sell out everywhere, but that doesn’t mean its because of his material. He doesn’t even compare when it comes to guys like Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Robin Williams, Rodney Dangerfield, or Bill Hicks. Those guys are legendary. Those guys have jokes that  20, 30, 40 years ago are still just as insanely funny today. You can read their jokes and you laugh. Write down almost any Dane Cook joke and written, it isn’t funny. It’s not as good without him running around the stage screaming his head off. That isn’t the mark of great material. Sure its a great showmen, but not a brilliant comic.

So all that being said, it is true that Cook has been stealing material all this time (which I now believe he ahs been), I kinda tarnishes the guy in my eyes. I mean whats really the point anymore?

You know you months now things have been pissing me off and I keep trying to figure out ways to handle them. I write my thoughts down, I go for walks, punch a wall. Shit like that. But just yesterday I came up with a brilliant idea. WWPD – What Would Peril Do?

 My good buddy, Mr. Peril Lost has this amazing way of expressing himself when it comes to…well anything. But when something or someone pisses him off, he seems to rise above the rest when it comes to just letting all that crap out. The best part? He leaves you in tears from laughing so hard. Why else would we immortalize the bastard with Radio Peril?

So I want to take a chapter out of his book for a moment and try to get some of this stuff out there. When something pisses me off it tends to be really little things. Things you probably don’t even consider. For example, the second window at drive thru. What in the feck is that? Are there not enough jobs that fastfood resturants now have to have one job for the person who handles the money and then a completely separate job for the person who gives you your food? Have we as a society become that retarded that we can no longer do both? And what is with the person who gives you your food?! That’s a job?! They are getting paid to stand at the window and hand me my food? At least the dude at the money window has some level of responsibility. He’s gotta take your cash, let the register do the math for him, then give back the right amount of change. Although I think there should be a rule for that guy. When someone gives him exact change, he shouldn’t get paid get paid. Take 5 minutes off his time card because he clearly didn’t do shit other than take your money and stick it in a drawer. A brain dead monkey can do that.

What’s worse than the second window at a drive thru? Not knowing if one of the windows is open. See some times McDonald’s is a real bitch and decides to throw you that curveball. You go there, order your food, you know that second window is there, you drive around and…no one is at second (technically first) window. So you just stopped and waited for a few seconds at an empty window for no reason other than the fact that you tried to follow the system, but on this day the system decided to smack you in the face.

What’s worse than even that? Well it’s when you think the second window is closed, but the damn thing is really open!!! Yeah. Happened to me. It was like 10pm, I was hungry, but didn’t want to spend much money. So I head to McDonald’s and apparently so did many other people. The drive thru line was about 10 cars with me about number 4 or 5. I order my meal, drive around, go to the stupid money window and am already to pay. Thing is no one is at the window. But I wait about 45 seconds just in case because there were a number of cars behind me so once I pull there is no backing it up. I wait, and wait, and no one is coming to take my money. Remember….not a hard job. The space between me and the car in front of me is growing. It’s the moment of truth and I go for it! I move up about a car length and the car behind me gets up to that window now behind me. It’s right at this moment where I see out my side mirror some blonde Latino girl stick her head out that money window. She realizes that she isn’t at her incredibly easy position and that I have just pulled up without giving her the money.

I go up to the food window and immediately hand the woman the money. She looks at me like I had two heads, but understands that the ditz at the money window couldn’t sit there and just take money and hand out change. She takes my money, uses the register in front of her, and gives me my change. Now in hindsight, I realize I probably could have gotten away with a free meal, but oh well. I’ll survive the five bucks. Now as I am waiting for my two cheeseburgers and fries, the food window woman turns around and yells something in Spanish in the back. I have myself a laugh knowing that the bimbo at the money window is getting chewed. Hell, maybe she got fired. Not like I care. DO YOUR EASY ASS JOB! I WANT MY POOR QUALITY YET EXTREMELY TASTY BURGERS!!

And that’s what Peril would do. Fuck the people in their easy jobs. Don’t come between me and my fast food urges.

OK. For those who know me, the question you are asking yourself at this very moment is this: “Why the hell did he go and register on one of these sites?” To which I so humbly respond…Shut the fuck up, and let me do my thing damnit!

All quiet now? Good. The real answer is this. I need a place to express myself. For ToH buddies, I used to do that all the time with the sfi blogs and you know I had a blast. Well we don’t have those in ToH, and Radio Peril doesn’t feel the same. I get too many of the kids responding to those posts and they ruin what I try to get across. So I’m gonna work here for a bit and see how it feels.

For those not my ToH buddies but are my friends….well get ready for a side of me you actually have probably never seen before. The ranting, the raving, the well thought out public displays of anger and annoyance. It is all part of the mind gone mad. So welcome and let’s see where this crap goes.